Saturday, January 06, 2007

Confuse a Doc!

In the best tradition of Python, who offered a "Confuse a Cat" service, I now happily offer for a limited time only , my "Confuse a Doc" service, at the temporarily reduced price of $19.95 (plus handling and shipping).

What the heck, if you can do it you can sell it. This is the internet after all! Since I missed the first I-bubble, and failed to make ten M $ off gullible stockholders before my idea of selling ice cream cones on line went south, I figure it's time for my money ship to come in. Nothing quite so much fun as confounding the physician. Buy now and avoid the rush!

Last night my lab tests indicated that I was in kidney failure and a likely candidate for kidney dialysis. Today's lab tests came back absolutely normal. Not just high normal but thuddingly dull normal.

The doctor's immediate response was that last night's readings were a lab error. The lab technician bared her teeth and said, "I ran those tests three times last night, and when the results were so different today I ran those three times. Then I went to the leftover blood from last night and reran it. That result was consistent with last night's readings. Don't ask me how, but today her levels are fine."

So, while I still get to revisit a number of cardiac tests, and probably will not be able to talk my way out of a cardiac angiogram this time, I don't need to see the renal specialist because I don't have a kidney problem.

I just have some very confused doctors.

7 comments:

SMM said...

dare I say ...told you so...see comment on previous post...now study up for the heart related tests and confund the buggers again.

Mandy said...

I am terribly relieved to hear that you don't have kidney problems. What is an angiogram?
Love,
Me

Nep said...

I am suitable queasy at the concept of "leftover blood."

Like, how long do they leave it sitting around for? :)

Deb said...

A coronary angiogram is a sort of 3-D x-ray of the blood vessels on the outer surface of the heart. They make a small cut in your femoral artery (at your groin) and thread a small tube up to your heart. When they get htere they inject some contrast medium and take the x-rays. I managed to talk my way out of this test the last go-round, this time I doubt if I can. I've had a hepatic angiogram, so the same procedure but looking at my liver. Not a pleasant experience. The coronary ones are not so painful.
:))

Deb said...

Leftover blood in the fridge? I have no idea. This tech drew about 10 vials each time, so she didn't have to come back and stick me a second time. She was good, didn't hurt much at all. But then I am used to blood pokes.

OutHouse Capital of Canada said...

Sometimes, I wonder if all those doctors know what they are doing.
About the weather, you seem to have arrived in one of our once every 15 years winters, we had a winter like this back in the early ninties, so dont let the locals tell you it never happens.
Last year at this time, we were outside working in the yard, we redid our fishpond with a new liner, no ice on the water and all the fish in a garbagecan

Susan said...

I am happy that the results came out normal . All the Best in the New year.