Royal Flush

Toilets in an RV are different than yer house toilet. For one thing they only use a tiny amount of water. I haven't yet figured out why RV-style toilet mechanisms haven't been adopted by the "greenies" as the ultimate low-water use toidy.

Be that as it may, the 35-year-old avocado green toilet in the Tinpalace's bathroom finally kicked up daisies after a long and successful run. (no pun intended) About ten days ago the trap mechanism failed, leaving the trap open by about 1/2" all the time. Surprisingly this didn't smell the way we thought it would, or else we have become entirely insensate to odours after spending a winter with a 23 pound cat, his litter box and two fully functioning humans in a 7'6" x 21' space.

We called Gary, the much-relied on RV repairman for this end of the valley. He took a look and made a phone call which apparently amused an RV parts supplier to no end. Surprisingly there were no replacement parts available for 35-year-old avocado green toilets, though he found it funny that we should ask.

This toilet has caused us some degree of distraction over the months. Tony has a bleeding problem, so we tend to keep an eye on such things as the colour of his wee-wee, and that is absolutely impossible in a green toilet.

I remember years ago, when our family doctor and his wife were very good friends. We were at their house for dinner and afterwards toured their large garden. We left laden with edible greenery. I cooked some of them for dinner the next night. When Tony got up at 6:00 the next morning he produced shocking bloody urine. He called our friend the doctor, who asked through a mouthful of toast if we'd enjoyed the beets he gave us.

Tony was a bit taken aback, "bleeding" as he was, to be asked about his enjoyment of a root vegetable, but he stammered that, yes, we'd eaten them the evening before and, thank you, they were delicious. "Good," the doctor said, slurping away at his orange juice, "you're peeing beet pigment, go drink some water and let me get to the office."

Today Gary brought a lovely white toilet and installed it in our teeny bathroom. I never thought I'd miss the green one. Believe me, I don't.